The first nI(gh)T

(Disclaimer: The following is the transcript of a what we think is a heated IT related debate between husband and wife during their first night. Rest is left to interpretation :-))

Wife enters the room with her usual bunch of fruits and a glass of milk… Husband is seated on a nice cosy(e) be(y)d…

Wife: Why do you look so amaze(d) on seeing me!?
Husband: I B(ea)M with new energy and excitement as you enter the room…
Wife: Huh. Let(s) pack (some) hard action and talk crap later… (thinking to herself what a Bore (she has) landed with)
Husband: YE YE! A Sport(s)y wife!!! So do you wish for a Sun or a daughter?
Wife: Its your wish dear… (implied “you moron”)
Husband: I want a Sun. Sun is always INTELligent… So I want you to have an Apple a day…
Wife: And why is that???!!!
Husband: An Apple a day keeps the daughter away…
Wife: Sigh Man… Tech industry has so many dumbos who don’t know proper English… This is my fate…

Lights are switched off… In the darkness, the last heard shouts were…
Husband: ……… YAHOO!!!!!!!……… Goo gal go…
Wife: ……… What are you yelling about…? How can you hope for a Sun when you are all micro (&) soft…

Idly Vada Sambhar - Start Music...

In the not so distant present…
In fact right at this very moment.
Three characters who live not so far…
And go by the name of Idly, vada and sambhar!!!

The first in the list is Idly…
Not a single thought ever that is silly…
A mind so pure and white…
He can only think of what is right!

The next one has a hole right in the middle…
And is never OK in playing the second fiddle.
Not the one to spare a word…
If Vada says something it has to be heard!

None of their views can ever bind…
Sambhar’s completely fluid mind.
She loves to unleash her friendly tantrum…
Others however feel it is akin to hearing a loud drum!

The next set of many blog posts…
Involve a lot of conversations amongst our hosts.
Some nice, some silly, some thought provoking…
But more than anything, all of them comment invoking!!!

The Ten (+2) commandments to act important at the work-place

I cannot use simple words from Greek and Latin for nuts. So my commandments will be in plain English…

1. You shall always enter the floor with animated business conversations over the phone…
   …fighting with your spouse over the phone is easier than fighting with them in person…
2. You will monitor all documents on your computer screen closely…
   … lest you miss out on reading any forwards in your mail-box…
3. You shall get your coffee to your desk…
   … sitting in your chair and browsing the net with a coffee in hand is a true pleasure…
4. You will always have a busy look on your face…
   … tracking India’s dismal performance in cricket, my stock performance in the BSE and completing all the household chores is no mean task…
5. You shall not answer calls in the first ring ever…
   … that display name does not say “Aishwarya Rai” right?...
6. You will be seen in intense business discussions with your boss…
   … it is better to fight out all salary issues right up-front…
7. You shall call for frequent meetings…
   … it is so tough to act busy sitting in one place the whole of the day…
8. You shall always have a note-book in hand wherever you go…
   … What good are meetings for anyway if you can’t doodle your way to glory…
9. You shall talk the loudest during conference calls…
   … you need to talk at some point in time to justify your earnings for the day…
10. You shall always go home late despite whatever little work you may have…
    … cause your spouse may not appreciate your listening to music, reading novels and playing tetris on the comp. at home…

Two bonus commandments...

1. You will call your team mates late in the night for business reasons…
   … this is one quality of your boss that you can imitate…
2. You will program your outlook to forward official mails after you sleep off…
   … the psyching feeling of their boss awake so late in the night for work is really chilling for the team…

Any more commandments may be added in the comments section...